Tag Archives: dencia

Thank You Cameroon, But It’s Time For You To Come Get Dencia

Not pictured: The 100 ice packs and 50 ice blocks that were needed to make sure the studio & everyone in it didn’t overheat & implode from being in such close proximity to the White Witch Of The East.

In case you needed further proof that she thinks with her implants, the ratchet ass used tampon that is Dementia went on Channel 4, UK to whore out her Shitilicious concoction. And all I can say is, thank God she’s not in Nigeria, even if only for a few days.

Now that she’s gone, I think its time for us to collectively petition Cameroon to come drag this hoe home. What I really wanna know is why this trick continually refers to herself as Nigerian. Bitch, you’re a fucking Cameroonian (although you’re ALWAYS here), we DON’T want you, your Shitilicious or your empty brain. I could give a thousand reasons why someone needs to drag this trick by her weave all the way back to Cameroon, but I’ll just give ONE. That song is the single most autotuned mess I’ve heard in all my life, & this is coming from someone who sat through the whole of Ms. Croaky’s “Once Upon A Snore” album.

If you’ve not yet seen the video, I really don’t think you should bother. It’s just seven minutes of her redefining the word “dumb”. From the confused accent, to the fugly jumpsuit, tacky weave & shades, all I can get is that Dementia obviously needs to fall of a cliff & disappear permanently. Someone please say a prayer.

10 Stupidest First Tweets Of Your Favorite Nollysluts

Twitter’s eight people! Although most of us have only been on it for a few years. Twitter just introduced a new tool, First Tweet, with which you can see anybody’s first tweet EVER. Yours, your boo’s, your bff’s or your frienemie’s. And YES, you can find celebrities’ first tweets too!

WARNING! Do NOT click this link or you’ll be useless for the next few days, stalking the first tweet of everyone you know. Being the benevolent angel that I am, I’ve compiled the first tweets of some of our favorite nollysluts. You’re welcome.

LOL. You? A covenant with God? Stop it, my tummy hurts.

Duh!

You guys, I give up, this trick has been partying for so long, its just pointless to try to make her quit now. TOO LATE

Nigga, how hard can it possibly be to navigate Uti’s butt twitter?

Me too hun, still tryna figure out watchu been doing with yo life since Ije, 2010

I hate to break it to ya, but it’s probably the same traffic your career has been in for a decade now.

I’ll be right here hun, listening to my music & watching you make questionable life choices.

LOL, exactly what you’ve achieved in the past five years

Good for you,J, now if only you’d learn how to actually ACT

WTF are you typing? What is this? Twitter for toddlers?

I Just Weak; EXCLUSIVE; Dencia Debuts New Look On Oprah

That meticulously brushed wig! Those exquisite shades! That pristinely radiant skin! Those NATURALLY luscious lips! And Lawd! That tank top!
Dementia wishes she could, but that trick could NEVER pull this off. Not now, not in a jillion years. Not even if she stuffed all of her Shitilicious concoction up her butt.

This, Ladies & Gentlemen, is true unrefined ELEGANCE. Now, let the angels lift you to the heavens & beyond while you take in this image of pure artistic genius.

PERFECTO!

Why Wild Animals Shouldn’t Use Instagram III

So help me, if Dementia doesn’t quit this her one-sided feud with Lupy ASAP, Imma tie that trick down & stuff a gazillion litres of Shitilicious up her overripe water melon butt.
Something called a Toni Payne is adding an extra layer of fuckery to this shitshow on instagram, while Dementia claims sales are up by 70%. You guys, I actually believe her, I mean she’s probably gone from selling 1 jar a day to 7, so hey, that’s 70% right? Or it could be that she’s just still thinking with her implants.
Thing is, we still don’t actually know what’s in that Shitilicious concoction. It could be her farts, squirts & what’s left of her shitty brains bottled up & she’s somehow selling it as a legit cream. Ugh, the fuckery we take from this knuckle head.

Dencia Wants You To Know Just How Dumb She Is

So, um guys, Dementia is still tryna be famous. She’s obviously not selling that whitenicious shit as well as she’d like us to believe, or she wouldn’t be all up in our faces, every single day.
The ray of light that is Lupita Nyong’o spoke about black beauty at a Hollywood luncheon & mentioned getting a letter from a fan thinking of using Shitilicious. Dementia being the skeevy twat that she is went crazy on twitter again.
I’m totally in support of a hoe doing whatever she’s gotta do to make bank, but this particular hoe needs to chill. I mean, you really think a REAL star would go out of her way to mention you, a FAKE ass, shitbrained, nauseating cumwhore in a speech?
I’m starting to feel this bitch might be thinking with her implants.

In Which I Prove That Goodluck Is Already Campaigning For 2015

Am I the only one who’s noticed how much GEJ has been in the news lately? Second only to Dementia & her whitenicious BS.
In four days, he’s been in Kano, Bayero, Ife, Sijuwade, Oyo, Badagry, Ikoyi & Abuja. He’s been with monarchs, pastors & actors. How long till he’s seen with musicians, witch doctors & prostitutes?
I mean, really? A third term??? Fuck my life.