Tag Archives: uti nwachukwu

Ghost Queen, Pela Okiemute Says He Has A Girlfriend, Fails To Convince Me She’s Real

I usually try not to get offended by the “celebrity” shit that I hear daily, but I’m just getting word that Pela Okiemute is insisting he has a girlfriend, and I just want to know what the hell kinda fools he thinks we are.
This nutjob isn’t just saying he’s got a girl, he claims to have been dating her for three years now. I just gotta ask, what sorta fucked up bitch stays with a guy & watches him transform from black to brown to caramel to orange to yellow to white to Off white to faded in three years? (feel free to add any shade I might’ve missed)
Why are we just hearing about her now, only after a certain law has been passed?
I don’t mean to scare y’all or anything, but I just gotta point out that in under two months, four “connected” guys have all suddenly fallen in love. First, it was Uti, next Alexx, then our “metro sexuality guy” Prince & now this parasite. How long till Infantata (Denrele) goes crazy & starts dating Dementia?
And, just in case you’re wondering, this shit went down on Toke’s TRENDING snoozefest. We ALL oughta slow clap for the cinematographer who recorded that, I mean, how did he not instantly go blind as a bat with all the “heavenly whiteness” radiating in that room? Toke & Pela in one room?? I’m surprised those studios didn’t explode from the sheer intensity of the fumes emanating from these two stunt queens.
I’m just gonna leave this picture below of Ghost Queen & the “girlfriend” I suspect he’s referring to. Yeah, I still don’t believe the bottom bitch in this picture fucked that baby into that tricky White Witch, Toyin Lawani. Nice try guys, but I ain’t buying it.

Stars In Rags; The AMVCA’s

1. Ladies & Gentlemen, I proudly present to you, the ghost of Infantata. If you’ve not seen American Horror Story, get on it ASAP.
2. Alexx & Yemi. Still trying that fakelationship?
3. Uche Jombo. This is what happens when you try waaay too hard. Are you even breathing in that?
4. Uti. That pout! You go girl! That fugly outfit? All this started since you began fake dating Saeon.
5. IK. Is this the part where you take off your hat & pull out a vibrator rabbit or your butt plug? Are you lost??
6. Funlola. Ugh, so much red, what are you? A used tampon? And that purse? Why do bad things happen to good people?
7. Adunni Ade. You guys, this is how you hold in a fart on a red carpet & still look elegant. Take notes.
8. Chika Ike. Who’s nose is that? Your NEW face scares me.
9. I don’t know you, but that pose! This is how you do it people. Push your crotch out for the camera & let your boobs do the talking!

In Which Saeon Convinces Me She And Uti Nwachukwu Are In A Fakelationship

You guys, Saeon is amazing! She has in a single interview managed to convince me that this thing with Uti is definitely FAKE. Not that I ever thought it was even remotely real.
She tells Punch:
“I don’t like to put my personal business out there.”
(I’m sorry, what? Why then are you giving this interview??)
“I have known Uti for a while and he was in my only video. I met him prior to shooting the video because he helped me to bring some of the things I used in the video from England. We started talking, hanging out and then this.”
(and then this? A fakelationship?? You’d think anyone in love would say ‘and then we fell in love. No?)
“We are in love and he is a very honest person and also genuine. People would always say things about him which obviously are not true but that would not stop him from being him. He is God-fearing, very funny and of course, good-looking. This affair is no publicity stunt;”
(yeah, right. Of course, it isn’t. LOL )
“even though I know Uti is a big brand and I am only an emerging brand.”

So basically, she doesn’t wanna talk about her love life, but she’s still gonna talk about it without actually telling us anything romantic they’ve done, instead she’ll just tell us how God-fearing, funny & whatever Uti is with zero excitement in her voice & end by stating that its not a publicity stunt???
I just weak.

Fakelationship Alert: Uti Nwachukwu And Saeon

For some reason that is completely beyond me, these two pests are trying to convince us that they’re dating. LOL. Now stare at the pictures below & notice how there’s absolutely zero chemistry between them. They both look like they’d rather be anywhere else than with each other.
Being the benevolent human that I am, ill give you two some tips, actually one tip; if you’re gonna fake a relationship, give us something to work with, a sextape maybe? I’m just saying, go hard or DIE bitches!